“Why are you always visiting random states in the Midwest?”

“Why are you always visiting random states in the Midwest?”

Weddings, of course! 

There’s a Larkey contingent in America, and they’ve all found wonderful people to marry (yay!). But! Before I get into that, let me give you some great reasons to visit the Midwest: 

1)    CHEESE (on EVERYTHING!) 

2)    Stunning State Parks 

If you find yourself in Minneapolis, visit Minnehaha Park. There's a great waterfall that you can't see because of our super sweet selfie skills. 

3)    Highway systems that put the 401 to shame

4)    Trader Joe’s*

5)    Friendly people that are curious about your accent

We drove 14 hours to Minneapolis to celebrate the marriage of my cousin Leigh-Ann to her now husband Dean. Now that Leigh-Ann is hitched, there are no more single Larkeys in the USA. Sorry America! 

Leigh-Ann and Dean’s wedding may have been the last American Larkey wedding, but it was the first wedding Peter and I attended as an engaged couple.  We heard, “You’re next!” quite a few times, which made me go into, “OMG WE ARE ACTUALLY GETTING MARRIED. WE NEED TO START PLANNING THIS THING PRONTO” mode. What happens when I go into that mode? I start drinking martinis the night before the wedding at a lovely party thrown by Dean’s family, and encourage my extended family to do the same (sorry not sorry about that hangover, Uncle Jim!).

After a big breakfast that soaked up all the booze, Peter and I were able to enjoy the nuptials with a newfound appreciation of all the planning that went into that day. We also picked up a few ideas that we are going to “borrow” (read: steal) at our own wedding. Maybe you’ll want to “borrow” some of these as well. 

1)    Photo wall of parents/grandparents/great-grandparents on their wedding day. I LOVE looking at old photos. It’s fun to try and find resemblances between family members, and check out the fashion and beauty trends of yore. On a more sentimental note, it’s a great way to pay respects to the people that brought you into this world.  

2)    Serve wine and beer (no hard liquor). When there’s harder stuff around, people (like myself) start ordering shots and it can get real messy real quick.  

3)    A pre-wedding day dinner for all out-of-town guests. The actual wedding day is very busy, and you don’t always get a chance to catch-up with everyone. A rehearsal/family dinner remedies that. Just stay away from dirty martinis.  

4)    Marriage advice for the newlyweds. I might go one step further and give guests a piece of fabric to write their advice on so that I can make a wedding quilt (ambitious, but I’m up for the challenge.)  

Marriage advice! 

5)    Epic dance off. I wish I had video of Leigh-Ann and Dean’s. Those two have some sweet dance moves. I think Peter and I will have to take a dance class or two if we’re going to compete with that. 

Sweet dance moves! 

6)    Photo booth! Sure, they’ve become a wedding staple, but Leigh-Ann and Dean’s wedding reminded me just how much fun a photo booth can be. 

I’m kinda bummed that there are no more American weddings. Like I mentioned earlier, I love travelling to the US, and I have a great time hanging out with my cousins and their partners. I wish they lived a bit closer so that we could see each other more often. That being said, I can’t wait to show them how Canadians party in 2016. 

Squad goals. My Dad got in trouble by the photographer for taking this pic. He was cramping her style. 

Me and the bride! 

*I think my cousins think our Trader Joe's obsession is weird. I mean, if someone visited Canada and was obsessed with Loblaws I'd think it was weird. That being said, if you find yourself at a Trader Joe's in America, please pick me up some half popped popcorn.

Eating your Feelings Because Catering is Expensive

“Don’t forget to ask about linen pricing. That stuff’s expensive and can drive up your catering quote big time.”

Sage advice from my best friend Carly, who in 2013 was thrown a cloth napkin curveball by her wedding caterers.

Carly and I have been friends for over 20 years. We've also been known to run the occasional 5k while wearing Santa suits. 

Carly wasn’t the first person to mention linen pricing to us. In fact, it’s come up fairly often. I guess if you’re one of the first in your group of friends to get married, you don’t have anyone to warn you about all the “extras” that appear on the final catering bill (eg. Linens, glassware, cutlery etc.) Luckily, we are in our thirties and one of the last couples in our group of friends to get married. Sometimes “life” procrastination pays off.

So! With the linen warning in hand, I crafted emails to the Enoch Turner Schoolhouse’s four preferred catering companies. 

*Quite a few venues in Toronto have a “preferred caterers” list. That means you HAVE to work with one the caterers they suggest. 

What did I ask? My questions are posted below. I also asked for a sample quote that included 3 appetizers, 3-course dinner, and a late night snack. 

CATERING QUESTIONS
- My partner is a vegetarian and we are flirting with the idea of having only vegetarian cuisine. Is there a cost difference between a pure vegetarian event and non-vegetarian event? If so, by how much? What main vegetarian dish would be served? Can we also include a vegan main option? 

 - Enoch Turner provides seating, but do you handle tables/linens/glassware etc.? What is the pricing for the additional rentals, and do you offer different packages for the rentals?  

 - What are the shapes of the tables? How many do they fit?

- Is there an additional fee for soft drinks/ice? If so, what is that fee? If coffee and tea included in that price? 

-How much of a deposit do you require and when is it due?

- Does your staff help set up the table decorations? 

- What is the ratio of servers to guests? 

- Do the staff and servers receive a flat gratuity? 

- What happens to the leftover food? Is it donated to a local shelter, or is it available for guests to take home? 

- Are there any additional fees that we can expect that I have not mentioned in this email? 

I didn’t bother asking about the serving staff’s uniform, because I really don’t care. If that’s your jam, ask away! 

Out of the four preferred caterers I reached out to, only three responded. The most expensive caterer quoted us at $23,000. Yes, you read that correctly. When I asked about a price difference between an all-vegetarian event and one that served meat, I was told there was no price difference. 

“Sooo… there’s no price difference between steak and tofu?” 

Apparently not! I guess I should tell Loblaws they are underpricing tofu big time.

The cheapest quote we received was $18,000. Still ouch-worthy. The food alone was already $3000 over our budget. 

One of the caterers did give me great advice, though. She recommended ordering a midnight snack for half your guest list. It’ll save on food waste and cost. 

This is what I sounded liked when I received our catering quotes. 

After receiving all three quotes, I called up Carly to talk about the pricing (read: complain in a very overdramatic fashion). She suggested I play hardball. Tell the caterers how much I want to spend and see what I can get for that price. 

I love Carly. She’s such a bizness lady. 

Unfortunately I have yet to put her advice to good use. A part of me wants to use a venue that doesn’t have a preferred caterer. Plus, landmark fees. Most historic Toronto venues have them. It's to pay for the "wear and tear" of the building, and is usually a percentage of your total catering costs. That percentage can be 15 per cent, which is a lot of per cent when you're dealing with thousands of dollars. 

Plus, I want there to be plenty of food at our wedding. I love to eat, and the thought that someone might be hungry at my wedding makes my palms tingle with anxiety. FOOD! MORE OF IT! 

So! What am I doing instead of emailing the caterers? Ordering Thai takeout. A girl needs a break sometimes.